


Spiders Hate Peppermint

by spiderhollander



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Irondad, civil war didn't happen, peter reacts weird to peppermint, some pepperony sprinkled in here, spiders dont like peppermint, spiderson, tony doesn't know spiders hate peppermint, we love one sam wilson
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-28
Updated: 2018-12-29
Packaged: 2019-09-29 09:34:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17201033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spiderhollander/pseuds/spiderhollander
Summary: “FRIDAY, locate Peter Parker for me, would ya?” Tony said.“Look up, Boss.” FRIDAY responded simply.The group all looked up simultaneously to see Peter, attached to the ceiling in the corner, silently hissing at them.





	1. Chapter 1

Tony’s doctor had told him that his constant stress in life was only causing his health to deplete faster. Instead of taking pills and other medication on top of his previous prescriptions, his doctor offered up another possible solution.

“Yeah, no. I’m not trying any of your hippy dippy oil shit. It’s literally just a step down from putting a candle in the room,” Tony said in response. 

The idea was to give essential oils a shot for a few weeks as a more natural remedy before reverting back to a handful of pills a day. He had never been into any of that sort of stuff, opting with the pills as they were a one and done kinda deal.

“Again, Mr. Stark. This will just be a little trial period. There are many health benefits to using essential oils and I think it would be good to at least try it out,” she replied as she handed him the information he needed for his oils.

“Fine. But I am only trying this out to prove that it won’t work,” Tony replied as he made his way out of the med bay, carrying his new box of essential oils and fancy looking diffuser.

That night, as he and Pepper were getting ready for bed, he picked up the concoction booklet and began to read.

“Yeah right, like a mixture of citrus, Frankincense, Rose, and Jasmine are gonna help with depression.” Tony read on and got to a different section of the booklet. “Huh, so lavender is supposed to help with sleep? I’ll believe that when I see it.”

Tony put down the booklet and found the small vial of lavender essential oil and put a few drops in the diffuser along with some water and turned it on. Soon after, the room held the subtle scent of lavender which was surprisingly calming.

“That smells nice, Tones. Reminds me of that one perfume I used to wear,” Pepper said as she crawled in bed with him.

“Y-yeah. I guess it does,” Tony replied as he laid down next to her. Within minutes, Tony was fast asleep, Pepper not too far behind. 

The next morning, Tony awoke to Pepper gone and the sunlight showing through the slit in the curtains. He looked at the clock which read 8:32 am which surprised him as he went to bend at 12:00 am. He hadn’t had more than 8 hours of sleep in ages. Tony glanced over at his essential oil diffuser and quirked a small smile before getting out of bed and picking it up as he walked out the door.

“Good morning sunshine. How’d you sleep?” Pepper asked as she sat at the kitchen table, drinking her coffee and tapping away at her StarkPad. 

“Surprisingly well. Maybe this oil mumbo jumbo actually is what it cracks up to be,” Tony said as he plugged in the diffuser and filled it with more water. “What are we thinking about sniffing this morning?”

“You got anything that’ll clear the mind? I’ve got 3 meetings today and I do not want to deal with these ignorant people with all this stress,” Pepper said without looking up from her StarkPad.

Tony looked through the booklet and found one that just might work. He put a few drops in and turned it on as he grabbed a cup of coffee of his own. Slowly, the scent filled the room.

“Is, is that peppermint?” Pepper asked.

“Yeah, book said it was supposed to stimulate and calm the mind which was close enough,” Tony said.

“Well it’s lovely. I’ve gotta get going though. Remember that Peter is coming over today as well. You agreed to work on improvements for his suit with him,” Pepper said as she gathered her things.

“Yup, he texted me to remind me four times last night,” Tony said holding back a smile.

“Don’t you two get into too much trouble while I’m gone. Bye, Tony,” she said as she gave him a kiss before heading out.

Peter wasn’t supposed to come over for another few hours, so Tony collected his diffuser and made his way into the workshop, still diffusing the “mind-calming” peppermint.  
As he tinkered away, he didn’t even notice the time pass until the door to the workshop opened, followed by a high-pitched, “Hey, Mr. Stark!”

Peter made it about five steps in before stopping. Tony looked up to see Peter standing near the doorway, a look of disgust adorning his features.

“Hey, bud. What’s up with you?” Tony asked.

“Sorry, it’s just. Wow, Mr. Stark, it smells awful in here. Did someone die or something?” He asked as he backed up more towards the door.

“Uh, well not that I know of. I mean, it smells how it usually does in here, minus the diffuser,” Tony stated as he stood.

“I’m sorry, I just-” Peter shuddered. “I can’t stay in here. I don’t know why but that smell is repulsive. What is that?"

“Uh, peppermint? You can’t tell me you don’t like the smell of peppermint,” Tony said as he stepped towards Peter. Unbeknownst to him, this was a mistake as the smell of peppermint had been practically infused into Tony’s clothing after sitting so close to the diffuser for hours. Peter then did something Tony never thought he would see Peter do.

He hissed at him.

Legit, hissed and then ran.

Tony was baffled by the odd display from his young mentee and ran after him but it was like he disappeared. 

“What the hell, Pete? Okay, okay! I’ll turn off the peppermint. I didn’t know it was that deep,” Tony yelled as he made his way through the compound.

“Uh, Tones? Whatcha doin?” Steve asked as Tony made his way throughout the building looking for Peter. 

“Oh nothing. You know, just trying to find a teenage boy who ran off hissing at me after smelling peppermint. Just a normal day,” Tony responded. Steve couldn’t help but laugh at this and assisted in the search for Peter.

As the pair continued their search for the young spider, they acquired more people to aid them. So now, Peter had Clint, Bucky, Nat, Sam, Steve, and Tony looking for him. After searching for half an hour, Tony wanted to slap himself in the face. He never used his most valuable device.

“FRIDAY, locate Peter Parker for me, would ya?” Tony said.

“Look up, Boss.” FRIDAY responded simply.

The group all looked up simultaneously to see Peter, attached to the ceiling in the corner, silently hissing at them.

“There you are, Pete. We’ve look everywhere for you. Would you please come down now?” Tony tried to reason with him, but he got to close, and Peter hissed again and scurried away on the ceiling.

“What the hell, man?! That’s not Peter! That’s some shit straight outta a horror film or something!” Sam said backing away. “Nuh uh, I’m out. You deal with your weird ass kid yourself, Tony.”

Yeah, this is going to be a long day…


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The atmosphere was peaceful with a hint of excitement as the fire crackled and soft music played.  
> “Why doesn’t Santa have kids of his own? Cuz he only comes once a year!! HAA!!”  
> Peaceful atmosphere ruined.

The stockings were hung along the fireplace mantel and filled with all sorts of goodies. The Christmas tree was aglow as it adorned many different sparkling ornaments and lights. The plentiful presents underneath the tree waited anxiously to be torn open by excited hands. Amongst all the holiday beauty sat young Peter Parker by the fire as he sipped his hot cocoa and awaited the rest of his friends and family. The atmosphere was peaceful with a hint of excitement as the fire crackled and soft music played.

“Why doesn’t Santa have kids of his own? Cuz he only comes once a year!! HAA!!”

Peaceful atmosphere ruined.

Peter looked up from his mug as he watched his teammates enter the living room. Sam and Clint were laughing hysterically, obviously having just been the ones who said the joke. 

“Morning, Peter. Were you just sitting here all by yourself on Christmas morning?” Nat asked him as she joined him on the couch.

“I don’t mind. I was enjoying the peaceful, Christmas atmosphere before everyone showed up and turned a silent night into a lively one,” Peter said, sipping his hot cocoa.

“I don’t blame you, kid. Putting up with these lunatics on any day gives me a massive headache,” Tony said as he joined the two on the couch. “This is the first of many coffees for today.”

“Hey! You know you love us!” Clint countered, only to receive an eyeroll from Tony.

As the gang made their way into the living room, most carrying a cup of coffee, they exchanged “good mornings” and “Merry Christmas’s” to each other. 

“Okay, good morning everyone and Merry Christmas. So the deal for this present opening thing is we are going around clockwise in a circle, starting with the youngest, which just so happens to be you, Pete,” Tony announces to the group. “Go ahead and pick out whichever present you want to open.”

Peter excitedly stood from the couch and made his way over to the tree. He picked the smallest present since he always liked to finish with the big ones and made his way back to his seat next to Nat.

“Who’s it from, Peter,” Aunt May asked as she sipped on her coffee as well. She was there since she was Peter’s family and anyone who is Peter’s family is everyone’s family.

“It says it’s from… from you!” He exclaimed. May just smiled as she motioned for him to open his present.

Peter tore away the colorful wrapping paper to reveal a small box meant for jewelry. He carefully opened the box to find a beautiful set of gold cufflinks with red on the end. Peter looked up at Aunt May thankful, but slightly confused.

“Those cufflinks were your Uncle Ben’s. He always wore them on special occasions and he said he wanted you to have them when you were old enough to wear them. They’re a family heirloom,” she said.

Peter couldn’t hold back his smile, no matter how hard he tried. Tears began to well up in his eyes as he remembered Ben wearing them when he went somewhere special. Who knew something so small could be something so meaningful?

“Yeah, yeah, what a beautiful gift. Who’s next??” Clint said quickly. May shot him a death glare and Peter just laughed.

“I guess it’s my turn then,” Nat said as she got up to retrieve her present.

It basically went on like this for a little over an hour. The mound of wrapping paper in the corner continuously growing as each person tossed their torn-up paper on top of the rest. Finally, once all the presents were opened and hugs were exchanged as thanks, everyone grabbed their stocking to unload some of the smaller goodies before heading into the kitchen for the big breakfast Steve, Pepper, and Wanda prepared at the ass-crack of dawn.

“Well, yay. Hershey kisses are my favorite,” Bucky said, holding the bag up for everyone to see.

“Why don’t you share a kiss with me?” Sam said, laughing and 100% joking. He was too busy laughing however to notice that Bucky was leaning in closer and closer until…

“Ow! Why’d you hit me in the face with your freaking bag of chocolate?!” Sam yelped as he clutched his face.

“You said you wanted a kiss,” Bucky said, smirking as he popped one of the small chocolates in his mouth.

“Ooh! I got candy! There’s this fancy looking chocolate in here too. Looks festive!” Peter said as he pulled out the small bag of chocolate. 

Everyone was preoccupied opening their own stockings and he didn’t think Aunt May or Tony would mind if he had some chocolate before breakfast. It was Christmas after all.

He opened the bag and pulled out one of the festive looking chocolates, taking a huge bite out of it. He happily began to chew as the sweet taste of chocolate met his taste buds but stopped after a few seconds.

The overwhelming feeling of disgust and desire to spit out the contents in his mouth overpowered him. He tried to keep chewing but the longer he had the chocolate in his mouth, the more he wanted to throw up and scream.

Peter quickly spit out his half-chewed piece of chocolate and stood as he scraped at his tongue, making a sound akin to a whining toddler.

“Wow, Peter. If you didn’t like my homemade peppermint bark, all you had to do was nicely tell me,” Bruce said politely, trying to hide the hurt in his eyes. 

Peter ignored Bruce’s words and instead tried to find something to either replace the taste on his tongue or rip it out entirely. He was desperate for some sort of relief from the disgusting taste.

“Wait, you said ‘peppermint bark’? Oh, god. I wish I would have told you, Bruce, but Pete cannot stand the taste or smell of peppermint. It’s some weird spider thing. It’s like a repellent to him,” Tony stated as he tried to calm Peter down and hand him his hot cocoa.

“Oh… Well I’m sorry, Pete. I didn’t kn-”

“Get this GOD FORSAKEN taste OUT OF MY MOUTH!!! It’s like garbage covered in curdled milk!! God! Shit! Damn!” 

Everyone sat there in shock as they watched the youngest of the group run around hysterically, shouting absurdities and making a scene, which was highly out of character for the young spider. They watched as he freaked out and ran up to the ceiling to hide in the corner and hiss again.

“Great. Now we gotta deal with this shit again. I’m out,” Sam said throwing his stocking down and retreating to the kitchen.

Tony sighed.

“Someone go get the broom. Again.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> something screwy is going on with the notes so just ignore the thing about the new chapter. That's talking about the 2nd chapter. Thanks for reading though!!

**Author's Note:**

> Well hello there. So this has kinda been done before but I've never seen it like this so, here's this shit show. This had more Pepperony than I initially planned but hey, what are you gonna do? Also, thank you to iamnotasexbot123 for this beloved prompt on tumblr. Also, my tumblr is spiderhollander as well so :)
> 
> UPDATE!!   
> New chapter coming soon ;)


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